I’m writing this from my bed. It’s crazy how a few weeks ago I was perfectly fine and today I feel like I’m fighting for my life. I was diagnosed with pneumonia and realize that it is not even close to a common cold. In plain words: this shit sucks. The thought that my son who is 4 years old had this infection few weeks ago hurts me to my core. It is one thing to watch someone sick, but once you experience it yourself everything changes. They say you have to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes to even understand a third of their journey or to understand their reaction to life.
Funny thing is, this nightmare didn’t just stop with me. Not only did I have the pleasure of getting pneumonia, but my daughter who is 11 also contracted this nasty illness. She is healing up a lot better than mommy though. Thank God for healthy kids because my baby is doing very well healing up like my son did. My poor Heaven was a victim of circumstance because she has never even had the flu before. Unfortunately for me, The doctor found pneumonia on both sides of my chest which prolongs the healing process. The doctor said we caught it from being exposed to my son when he had it during the contagious stage.
What am I learning from this trial?
Well, a few things. Number 1: I don’t want to die right now. I wrestled with the thought that I would be at peace years ago to end my existence, because life seemed pointless and full of undeserving pain. However, I think when you are possibly facing death is when you will realize if you truly have a desire to live. I can’t leave my kids right now and I have a lot to accomplish. I fear meeting my Creator before living out his divine assignment. Or at least getting close to it…
Number 2: I can be up and down. That is a lesson for everyone. We will not always feel good or be living our best life. There will be bad days. So appreciate the days that you feel good and make the most of those days. When you are ill take the time out to take care of yourself, try not to mope and have faith that better days are ahead.
Number 3: I will always be there for the people who love and care for me. When you are low you always find out who your loyal supporters are. I’ve had some people I have least expected offer to bring me soup. My dad said “always remember your team because you will soon have a winning season”.
I will always remember this time of my life…
From A Mom who is fighting to live…
Tahnee Cole